Validation, Radiation and the Post Office

A friend of mine recently posted a YouTube video on his facebook page and, although it's a little out of character for me, I actually watched it. Even though it was more than 16 minutes long. I loved the depiction of the impact of one person - one average person without a high-powered job, fame, or probably a fortune.

The video reminded me of a quote I'd heard the previous Sunday at church: "Every person who lives in this world wields an influence, whether for good or for evil. It is not what he says alone, it is not alone what he does. It is what he is. Every man, every person radiates what he or she is. Every person is a recipient of radiation...It is what we are and what we radiate that affects the people around us...The effect of our words and acts is tremendous in this world. Every moment of life you are changing to a degree the lives of the whole world. … So, it’s not the surroundings, it isn’t the positions; the thing that will influence [others] in this world, are personalities. No matter what you are people will feel and recognize this. You radiate, you can’t hide it. You may pretend something else, but that will not affect people." (from Teachings of the Presidents of the Church: David O. McKay, Lesson 24)

So, I started thinking about my own life and what I radiate. Do I validate people and reflect back to them their own wonderful, unique qualities? Do I radiate love and acceptance and support?

I had some errands to run on my lunch break and stopped at the post office. The line was pretty long. The two women working the counter did not look happy. The people in line looked impatient. My initial impulse was to join the line of impatient customers. I was in a hurry, after all. I only had so much time for my lunch break. But then I was reminded of Validation and Radiation and I started to look for something I could compliment the post office worker on when I finally got to the counter. Since I didn't know which woman would serve me, I studied them both and picked out qualities about their work that I felt I could truthfully compliment. When I reached the counter, I greeted the worker with a smile and told her what a great job she was doing in moving customers through the line quickly and efficiently. Although she didn't smile at me exactly, it was clear that what I said had a positive impact. It was also clear that she doesn't hear what a good job she's doing often enough.

I doubt that moment changed her life, but it changed mine. I realized that I really can radiate more positivity. I really can have a positive impact on the world around me, even though I inhabit only such a small corner of it.

Making a Difference

I learned something today about making a difference.

It was my day off and I had a million errands to run. Ok, maybe not a million... Nonetheless, I spent a good portion of the day in the car. And my car spent a good portion of the day on toll roads. Being a typical 21st century woman, I was lucky to have any cash on me at all. And coins? Forget it! So I found myself in several long "Full Service" toll lines. The last one was at the beginning of rush hour and was by far the longest line I've ever seen at a toll booth. Hundreds of cars all waiting to hand their cash to one solitary worker, sitting in a sweltering booth.

As I sat waiting, periodically inching my car forward, I was exceedingly grateful for the air conditioning inside the car. And the fact that, for the most part, people were being pretty civil to one another.

Finally I made it to the toll booth. Where I was greeted by a cheerful attendant, who thanked me for my patience, wished me a good day, and hurried me on my way.

As I drove away, I was smiling.

That one person, doing his job, however mundane, with such a cheerful attitude, had an impact on me. He made a difference. He reminded me that we can all make a difference in our own little sphere. It may not be some grand gesture, but even a small thing like a pleasant attitude and a smile can have ripple effects that travel far beyond our immediate sphere.

Tomorrow, I'm going to make a difference.