A few days ago, I went to visit my grandmother in the hospital. She was awaiting surgery to amputate one of her legs. When I arrived, she was lying in the bed dozing. She had just received pain medication and it
seemed to be helping. She roused herself and we started to talk, but it was
clear that the medication was having the anticipated effect both on her pain
and on her mental capacity. She was groggy and not altogether with it.
Nonetheless, or maybe because of it, I was very impressed. She kept talking
about how blessed she felt, how loved by God. She also kept talking about how
proud she is of us and of her own kids. She kept saying how my dad did such a
good job raising us. Her face shone with a beatific smile.
I know (and have experienced myself) the kinds of behaviors
and inflammatory reactions that can come in the face of a scary and lifechanging event (like the amputation of a limb) and particularly when inhibitions are removed through
the administration of pain killers. But I was impressed that when Grandma’s
inhibitions were removed, what came shining through was her profound love of
God and her deep devotion to Him. Her true eternal beauty was so evident.
I hope that when I am faced with challenges and pain I can react with similar fortitude, gratitude, and humility.
A friend of mine recently posted a YouTube video on his facebook page and, although it's a little out of character for me, I actually watched it. Even though it was more than 16 minutes long. I loved the depiction of the impact of one person - one average person without a high-powered job, fame, or probably a fortune.
The video reminded me of a quote I'd heard the previous Sunday at church: "Every person who lives in this world wields an influence, whether for good or for evil. It is not what he says alone, it is not alone what he does. It is what he is. Every man, every person radiates what he or she is. Every person is a recipient of radiation...It is what we are and what we radiate that affects the people around us...The effect of our words and acts is tremendous in this world. Every moment of life you are changing to a degree the lives of the whole world. … So, it’s not the surroundings, it isn’t the positions; the thing that will influence [others] in this world, are personalities. No matter what you are people will feel and recognize this. You radiate, you can’t hide it. You may pretend something else, but that will not affect people." (from Teachings of the Presidents of the Church: David O. McKay, Lesson 24)
So, I started thinking about my own life and what I radiate. Do I validate people and reflect back to them their own wonderful, unique qualities? Do I radiate love and acceptance and support?
I had some errands to run on my lunch break and stopped at the post office. The line was pretty long. The two women working the counter did not look happy. The people in line looked impatient. My initial impulse was to join the line of impatient customers. I was in a hurry, after all. I only had so much time for my lunch break. But then I was reminded of Validation and Radiation and I started to look for something I could compliment the post office worker on when I finally got to the counter. Since I didn't know which woman would serve me, I studied them both and picked out qualities about their work that I felt I could truthfully compliment. When I reached the counter, I greeted the worker with a smile and told her what a great job she was doing in moving customers through the line quickly and efficiently. Although she didn't smile at me exactly, it was clear that what I said had a positive impact. It was also clear that she doesn't hear what a good job she's doing often enough.
I doubt that moment changed her life, but it changed mine. I realized that I really can radiate more positivity. I really can have a positive impact on the world around me, even though I inhabit only such a small corner of it.
